The Land That Sanity Forgot

The House of Red

I hesitate to do this. It's kind of a "don't shit where you eat" conundrum for me. If I really blast my place of employment, where my entire income is based on tips, on the internet I'm essentially asking to make less money. However, since what went on there last night has direct ramifications for this site and my ability to contribute to it I guess I'll risk it.

For those of you who aren't aware this week is National Television Turn Off Week. Parents, schools, scout troops, and other (mostly children based) groups are encouraging Americans to find other ways to entertain themselves for one television free week. I think it's a great idea if you're a parent. Today's kids are definitely growing up in a more sedentary lifestyle than even my generation and a week of forced alternative activities will certainly make a healthy contribution to their overall well being. Less television, more sports, books, conversation, all good.

This good idea takes a horrible turn for the bizarre when you attempt to integrate it into a bar. That's right, the owner of the Red House and his omnisprescent girlfriend have decided to observe National TV Turn Off Week at work as well. That means no Celtics playoff game, no Red Sox games, no Sportscenter, no CNN, nothing. This is like going into the Post Office and having the postal employee force you to floss while you stand in line. Sure it's a good idea in it's place but it just doesn't translate to everywhere.

Now to be fair the Red House is in Cambridge, and 02138 is an area prone to acceptance of such forward, albeit misguided, thinking. Unfortunately, even in Cambridge this idea simply does not translate to a business and has caused nothing but problems.

The first problem it causes is the necessary expulsion of the general rule that the customer is always right. The Red House is by no means a sports bar, but it also not the liveliest room in town and a little electronic distraction is always appreciated by our regulars, most of whom come in alone seeking drink first, a game to watch and comment on second, and company third. These regulars and a bevy of normal customers have expressed their unhappiness with the idea to me, to the general manager, and to the owner himself (who makes untimely visits to the bar to chat from time to time) to no avail. He has had two responses: the public response and the behind the scenes response.

Public Response: It's the principle of the thing. I don't want the TV turned on for a whole week in my house and this is like my house. I live here (which he doesn't) everynight I invite you into my house, and of course I care if that costs me business but the principle is more important.

Behind the Scenes Response: I WON'T BE PUSHED AROUND BY ANYONE! When I make a decision it's not a democracy it's the way it is!

The result, unhappy customers who leave feeling unhappy and shaking their heads, unhappy staff who resent their employer even more than usual, and an embarrassed GM who has to explain this situation a thousand times an hour for the next week.

The following scenario actually played out before my very eyes last night. An attractive young woman enters the bar and immediately seeks the attention of the GM. She tells him that she is a student of Bill Gergin (an amazingly nice and brilliant professor at the Kennedy School at Harvard who frequents the Red House) and that Prof. Gergin would like to bring his class of about 18 people into the bar at 8:00 PM to watch President Bush's speech. The GM informs her of National TV Turn Off Week and that he will have to ask the owner for permission to turn to TV on for that half an hour. He disappears for about 5 minutes (during which time the afore mentioned "behind the scenes response" takes place) and returns with the news that despite the fact that Prof. Gergin is a great customer and that his 18 students would triple the population of the bar at 8:00 PM the Red House regrets to inform him that his request is denied and that the owner's principles and pig-headedness are more important than a simple and profitable courtesy. The woman stands there looking shocked and says, "You're kidding right?" When she receives a sad shake of the head she turns and leaves the bar sadly shaking her own head.

Now a bar feisty bar regular named Mary Murphy caught this scene as she was entering the bar and inquired about it. When I explained it to her she said that she would push the owner to turn the TV just for the Celtics game. The result of that exchange was the owner behind the bar, in my way, leaning in to berate her with his finger an inch from her face, while a room full of people watched in horror. I swear to you the world at 98 Winthrop Street has spun off of its axis. There is never an appropriate justification for brow beating a customer, especially not within view of other patrons, and the degree of self absorption required for such a display is beyond my imagination.

The real problem here is that he knows he's wrong. At this point the 100% negative response that he's received has to have made an impression. But he is such an arrogant, self serving, pompous, narcisstic maniac that he would rather alienate his entire staff, his regular customer base, and the casual customer so as to avoid admitting his mistake. It really is a sad situation to watch him so angrily try to defend a terrible idea with such vigor.

One more little anecdote. When the GM was cashing out on Wednesday night he turned the TV on to have something in the background while he worked. The restaurant was closed and he was there alone. Somehow the owner found out and berated him about it saying that it wasn't about just keeping it off while the place was open, but that the TV was to stay off for the entire week because he said so. He actually said these words to another adult, "When I tell you to do something you fucking do it." Can you imagine being a 37 year old professional and having your boss speak to you like that?

So the point is that I can't write anything about the Celtics game today because I didn't see a single second of it, and I won't see a single minute of Saturday's game, or today and tomorrow's Red Sox games. Not to mention my wallet is considerably lighter because all of my potential customers keep leaving before they spend any money.

Jealous?

Thank God I gave my 2 week notice yesterday, thank God. Click here to check out my new place http://www.dockside-hyannis.com. You can check out the house of insanity at http://www.theredhouse.com.