Sunday One Liners

- Never let your girlfriend take you home at 11:50 in front of all your best friends. NEVER

- Football games that live up to the hype are rare, USC v. ND was one of the top 5 games ever.

- The Patriots' schedule is not fair.

- Playing one solid half of football is not enough for the Patriots to win anymore, especially since they are destined to play only playoff contenders for the rest of the season.

- Ladanian Tomilinson is a fantasy God, a touchdown passing, receiving, and running in the same game is just unreal

- I am really allergic to something at my buddy Berth's house, my eye was swollen shut this morning, either that or I got beat up by a townie in Worcester last night.

- Regarding the previous statement, I hate cats.

- I will not go out of my way to watch Houston play Chicago in the World Series, neither will you.

- BC should hardly have moved up in the polls after yesterday's near disaster against Wake Forrest.

- ND deserved to stay at their ranking despite a loss.

- The kids who prematurely stormed the field before the USC v. ND game was over spent the longest night of their lives in jail, if they weren't from ND I'd feel bad for them.

- Matt Leinart has replaced Tom Brady as the official "Guy I Would Choose to Trade Places With" if given the choice. This change was precipitated by the amount of time Brady spent on his back this afternoon.

- Here's the thing, I really don't want to get a job, but I would love some income, who wants to be my sponsor? "NESL, the offical law school of the Boston Slant" or "Gibson Gibson Domain, for real estate truly slanted in your favor" or "The Ways and Means Committee, offically slanting your tax dollars into babysitters for state officals."

- I was clearly not an advertising major.

- What the hell was the point of this post?

- My buddy Mike called a 300 pound girl at midnight last night to tell her to come meet us at the Blarney Stone.

- 2 years ago Berth made out with said 300 pound girl...in a bush.

- Mike clearly called her in hopes he would see the spectacle again.

- StatTracker + hangover = bye bye Sunday.

- Your life is pretty lame when you really look forward to your Monday night old man hoops league...really really lame.

- If anyone has been patient enough to get to this point in the post I thank you, and you get a prize...as soon as that sponsorship kicks in.